The UK’s current sex education curriculum for schools was last updated in 2000, before we had ever heard of camera phones, Facebook or YouTube. It’s a different world, so an update of schools’ sex ed programmes is long overdue.
So, to be implemented from 2020 onwards, a new curriculum has been proposed by the government and, although it is mostly pretty sensible, there is already a “won’t somebody think of the kiddies?”-style backlash occurring.
Teaching four year olds about consent
Some of the ideas are bound to cause tabloid screeching, such as a plan to teach four year olds about consent, as if the idea is to get these tiny humans and explain the best shagging etiquette for when they’re adults.
In reality, starting four year olds off with the idea that you shouldn’t give your friend a hug when they don’t feel like one is a great idea. Or that if somebody says no, they mean no. This is what is meant by consent classes for four year olds, so that they can begin to respect their own bodily autonomy and understand and respect others’, too.
Looking at bodily boundaries can start at any age and, the earlier this is taught in schools, the sooner children can learn how to behave with regards to other people. It is nothing sexual in itself, it is simply good practice and good behaviour, and primary school teachers know exactly what they are doing when it comes to teaching such lessons.
We trust them to teach about reading and history, why not this?
As the children get older, their sex education will become more explicit. While still getting an age appropriate education, children and young people will learn about sexual consent, STIs, the mechanics of sex, sexual abuse and LGBT issues.
Teaching young people about LGBT
As a gay kid who grew up under the shadow of section 28, any kind of education about LGBT issues would have been life-changing for me. Battling with my identity and my religion, or my identity and a heterosexist society left me distressed, self-hating and contributed to mental health problems as I grew older. Without the web, and without any local LGBT organisations or groups, I was alone and very, very frightened with little information to guide what I was feeling and thinking.
While positive education about LGBT issues would have to be delivered by an understanding and open-minded teacher, if it was done so it could be similarly life-changing for queer or trans kids now who, even though they most likely have easy access to the web, may fear that their parents are monitoring their activity or who simply haven’t got as far as searching for information yet.
It will also help those kids whose parents, relatives or friends are in same-sex relationships, to understand and relate to people who are different to them and act respectfully towards them. Similarly, children who are not trans can be taught about the issues trans people face, leaving them – hopefully – more friendly and open to trans people they meet in the future, or their friends who come out at a later stage.
Stopping parents from pulling their children out of sex education
At present, parents are allowed to remove their children from sex ed classes and this is a ridiculous situation. If parents can’t pull their kids out of maths or geography, there is no reason they should be able to remove them from this subject, which is equally as important.
And, of course, the kind of parents who don’t want their children to learn about sex education at school are probably not the kind of parents who provide a comprehensive view of sex at home, either. Their children will need a formal education more than most.
Under the new proposal, parents will no longer be allowed to remove their child from sex education if the child is 15 years old or over, at which point they will be allowed to request sex education for their three remaining terms at school. Putting the onus on the young person to ask for an education about sex looks like a mistake to me – it’s not a topic that a lot will be keen to talk about with teachers – and being allowed to remove under-15s still puts a lot of children and young people at risk.
It’s such an inadequate allowance that I am reluctant to even give them a tiny bit of credit for the minor step forward. If we can expect another 20 years before the curriculum and school guidance is updated again, I’m not willing to wait until 2040 before all children have access to the same teaching.
Come back to me when no children are allowed to be removed from sex education classes and I’ll start to applaud then.
Photo credit: Tullio Saba/Creative Commons