When I started this column about mental health in America, I never could have predicted just how insanely bizarre the year that lay ahead would be. It’s not time to take stock yet — more adventures await us! — but I would, however, like to take a deep breath and address something that’s been on my mind lately post election:
Too many of us who get involved in the political narrative right now are inevitably centering ourselves. This is why so many Democrats assume that people who voted for Trump in spite of *gestures towards our collective pandemic/political/economic/etc shitshow* are somehow looking for forgiveness.
This is ALSO why so many Republicans are keen to cry foul over the election results. I’m not talking about establishment politicians who are already looking forward to 2024 and playing their own games with an addled narcissist of a lame-duck president — I’m talking about the people who genuinely believe that CHEATING has definitely TAKEN PLACE and totally on a MASSIVE SCALE, even though the data says otherwise. After all, if they really believed they were going to win, surely the only plausible explanation for Joe Biden’s win is “massive fraud.”
Please note that I’m not trying to both-sides this situation. While I would have preferred to stay an independent, the notion of civic duty pushed me toward the Democratic Party after Trump won. I think the Republican party has been an absolute disgrace with Trump at the helm — but I also think that Trump is the natural byproduct of years of Republicans courting and stoking rage for a chance at more power, a deal with the devil that is currently tearing the country apart.
What I am saying, however, is that in times of uncertainty and stress, it actually helps to de-center yourself a little! It helps to understand that we are part of a *collective* narrative, with all of the good and bad that it entails.
Because I believe that the biocentric model of the universe is the best way to explain our reality, I believe that perception really is everything. It carries tremendous power. And that’s not just me making shit up, there is physics to back this up. This is why it’s important, right now, to just step outside yourself and maybe look up at the night sky every once in a while. It’s not much, but it’s a start.
We think of being self-centered as fundamentally pleasurable. It can be! But it can also be very stressful. You take on too much at once. You think you need to insert yourself everywhere. You think you’re required to have a Very Passionately Expressed Opinion on literally everything.
The truth is — you make a bigger difference when you apply yourself conscientiously, pick your battles, and know when to disengage. One of the points I keep trying to make with this column is this: you’re no good to others if you’re running on adrenaline and old coffee grounds or whatever. You’re especially no good to others if you are unable to focus.
This is why I am such a big believer in therapy, which helps us establish more helpful thought patterns, but I am also a big believer in utilizing therapy to simply regain some agency every once in a while. Let go when you need to let go. Plug in when you need to plug in.
It is going to be a rough transition period. More surprises await. Save your strength for when you need it most, and don’t try to get into other people’s heads right now.
Image credit: Wokandapix