Not satisfied with the disproportionate amount of acclaim and wealth shoved at them by drooling zombies otherwise known as the human race, celebrities manage to lock themselves in titanic struggles with each other over perceived slights.
They will make public statements, release stinging responses on their respective blogs, and basically act like spoiled children bickering for attention. Personally, I give it to them, because I find them funny. Not intelligently funny, or even funny on purpose. Their entertainment value is very similar to that of the video where the monkey doesn’t like the taste of his own pee, and then he falls off the branch.
However, I’ve picked out a few of the more salient current cases in which celebrities are brawling with each other. Using my brilliant analytical skills, as well as my flair for sensational insight, I have prepared a study on each conflict:
Paris Hilton vs. Lindsay Lohan:
The strangest thing about this spat is the fact that the two idjits involved are practically interchangeable. Both of them are known for their rampant lack of underwear, a fact that has scorched the eyes of the planet. Further similarities and points of interest: Continue reading