Global Comment

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BREAKING: Jeremy Corbyn continues to suck

Jeremy Corbyn

Not content with sitting on the sidelines during the Fossils Saying Stupid Things About Ukraine parade, former UK Labour leader, Jeremy Corbyn, has given an interview to a pro-Russian, Beirut-based channel, in which he urged Western countries to stop arming Ukraine.

Might this stop the war? Sure, assuming that Ukraine no longer existing is an acceptable outcome of said war. It seems that this would be perfectly acceptable to Magic Grandpa Jeremy, considering that he has been more than happy to enable the murderous Bashar al-Assad in the past.

For the record, just in case you’ve been under a rock these last few months: Russia’s Vladimir Putin has stated that his war on Ukraine is a war of imperial conquest, while comparing himself to Peter the Great (I imagine Peter rolling over in his grave at the little Kremlin gnome’s boastful pronouncements, to be honest). There is no doubt about it. Putin has always shown us who he is, he’s just gotten more vicious and belligerent about it.

Corbyn crying crocodile tears over how devastating the war has been is an obfuscation. He’s just an amoral isolationist contrarian, longing for the days of the Soviet Empire, appealing to sections of the British left who sit around pubs in unwashed socks quoting Lenin.

Of course, it was predictable that Corbyn would say this. What would truly be shocking if he had displayed any original thoughts on Russian aggression, or the aggression of any bloodthirsty foreign dictatorship for that matter.

What has brought me a tiny sliver of satisfaction in watching the continued debacle of Western “anti-imperialists” cheerleading the Russian empire is that the Russians all hate them.

I am, however, interested in Corbyn’s fans, probably because they are so annoying. One American Corbyn fan, the screeching Putinist hyena known as Glenn Greenwald, has of course endorsed Grandpa’s disgrace of an interview. For Greenwald, the calculus is even simpler than for Corbyn — his stupid fans pay him money to say stupid things. The overall content doesn’t matter as long as it conforms to a simple formula, “America bad.” It’s an entire group of people who had a collective aneurysm when Iraq was invaded, and never recovered or paid much attention to anything else.

“America bad, America support Ukraine, Ukraine bad.”

There are plenty of ancient cave drawings that are more complex and interesting than this (seriously, check them out), but that won’t stop the morons. Stupidity is a powerful currency precisely because it’s so simple. Simplicity is soothing in a complex world oversaturated by information.

What has brought me a tiny sliver of satisfaction in watching the continued debacle of Western “anti-imperialists” cheerleading the Russian empire is that the Russians all hate them. Trust me, I lived and worked in Russia long enough to know this. Russians find people like Corbyn and Greenwald useful, but they do not respect them. For one thing, they still see their Western fans as enemies, simply by virtue of their provenance.

More importantly, Russians abhor and distrust traitors. If you are a traitor to your own country and society, they will use you — but they won’t like you.

Russians find people like Corbyn and Greenwald useful, but they do not respect them.

It’s true that the full scope of modern Russian nihilism is terrifying to behold. Russian nihilism maims, tortures, and kills people. It threatens humanity with nuclear apocalypse. It is coldly devastating. And it doesn’t win Russia any friends — only uneasy, morally bankrupt bedfellows at best.

The good news is that Russian nihilism is barren. It is reactive and not proactive. It inspires nothing new. There is almost a hint of that in Corbyn’s own anodyne statements on the matter — and in Greenwald’s ineloquent support of them. Beneath the veil of pro-Putin sentiment there is only an abyss.

The idea that it’s better to die standing up than live on your knees, however? That idea, championed by Ukrainians and other victims of Russia, such as Syrians, is stubborn and fiery. It’s a messy, bloodsoaked, difficult ideology to live by, but it persists. It finds a way.

The Corbyns  and Greenwalds of the world, safely ensconced in their smugness, won’t get it. But people who dare to be actually alive? They will.

Image: Alisdare Hickson