Years ago, when I was in college, a couple of friends of mine ran into Volodymyr Zelensky when buying alcohol for one of our parties, outside of a big supermarket in downtown Kyiv, not far from where my maternal aunts live.
I remember this incident, because Zelensky was a comedian known for his work on Kvartal 95, and my friends wryly told me that he was “flattered to be recognized.” My friends were and are beautiful actresses who both dress as if they are in a painting, so lots of people would be flattered to be recognized by them, I imagine.
I didn’t watch Kvartal 95 when I was hanging out in Kyiv on my summer breaks, but my late father did — often to the annoyance of my mother, who considered it an extremely lowbrow comedy outfit. I have no way of asking him about it now, but I think my father often turned the sound up on purpose.
Zelensky has a very distinct voice — back then it was gravelly in a funnier way than it is now, without its notes of tragedy — and it could pierce even the thick, 1930s-era walls of our rambling apartment.
The years came and went, and gathered into decades. The decades made certain decisions for us. At first, these decisions were imperceptible. You don’t recognize fate when it’s up close.
The street where my aunts live is one of my favorite streets in the world. I can probably tell you multiple stories about every block of this street — sad and funny ones, stories involving holiday debacles, family dramas, and a peeing incident I am sworn to secrecy about but will hint at anyway. I miss it now more than ever and see it frequently in my vivid, wartime dreams. It slopes gently up one of Kyiv’s many hills. I am forever running up the scarred sidewalk, but I am never fast enough.
That’s not the important thing, but I want to paint a picture for you anyway. How else can I connect to you in this time of hope and horror?
The thing about being a hero is that heroes are still ordinary. The internet gives us limitless opportunities to pick everyone apart, show their grainy, ugly side, explain in detail how they are not worth your time. But that’s not what I mean, not exactly.
Heroes are meant to be ordinary, to contain vulnerability. Otherwise, why would their extraordinary deeds or extraordinary leadership be in any way significant? Our perception of what it means to be a hero is borne out of contrast.
Our perception of what it means to be a hero is borne out of contrast.
Here’s a young comedian whom your glamorous friends think of as cheesy, and your radical feminist friends write off as a typical man. He’s leaning out of his friend’s SUV. He’s not flirting with anyone — the love of his life, Olena, is in the backseat — but he is tickled that two women in elaborate dresses, their hands full of bottles of sparkling wine, have smiled and waved at him. The supermarket sign casts a bright light into the warm Kyiv night. He smiles and waves back. He is excited.
If any of the people by that curb, in that moment, could catch a glimpse of the future, they would be, to paraphrase Margaret Atwood, as doomed as rocks.
Every once in a while, the world will bluntly ask you just what the hell you are made of. Until it asks, you don’t know. You may think you know, but that’s an illusion.
I think Vladimir Putin thought he knew what he was made of when he invaded Ukraine. If he were wise, he would perceive this illusion shattering all around him, bursting like a vein in a shower of blood. He is not wise, and this story is not about him anyway.
This story is about people who did not know, and were forced to find out — and are still finding out. None of us know how it will end. We just keep on trying in our own ways.
Don’t worship your heroes. Recognize their vulnerability — and how they keep pushing past it, because they know they have to.
This is what Zelensky has done, what my friends have done, and what millions of Ukrainians have done. And every day is a step toward that warm, glowing light, that sense of peace on a summer street, where other women can wave indulgently at other men.
Images: Сергій Козачок and President Of Ukraine
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